It use to be that I didn't enjoy myself very much. Everything I had to do as a mother seemed like a big CHORE. I was always wanting rest and rest was always eluding me. The needs of my children (at the time there were two) seemed unending, so every time there was a need it always took me off guard. AGAIN? I would say to myself. I JUST.... fill in the gap. My little blessings had turned into burdens and I didn't even recognize the fact that I had succumbed to that conclusion.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Let's Hurry!!!
I specifically remember going to Target one day. The children had to use the restroom. Of course. I didn't want to go to the restroom. I hate public restrooms. I immediately went into "let's hurry mode". My plan was to get in and out of there as quickly as possible so I could move on with life - which was trying to get out of Target as quickly as possible.
NOTE: Torment= A mother with small children trying to hurry. Period.
Anyway, I was in a hurry. They used the restroom which was an ordeal in itself, always was. When they were washing their hands they wanted to get the soap themselves. I wanted to get the soap for them so we could HURRY. Then they wanted to get their own paper towel. I told them no. We were in a HURRY. Then the Lord spoke to me. "Why are you in such a hurry all the time? Is the president waiting for you? Is there some important engagement?" Actually, my schedule was pretty much open. I was a stay at home mother. I actually had nothing to do. Most of my day I fought boredom.
The Lord then challenged me. "Why not enjoy your children? Why not let them get their own soap? Their own paper towel? So little makes them so happy. That in itself is a gift that only lasts a short time." I realized one day pulling the paper towel lever won't be such a big thing. Maybe I should enjoy it now.
That day life began to change for me. I resisted the silly and even pointless urge to always hurry through life. I decided I was going to stop and smell the flowers and let everything I do be fun with my children - even the WORK they required. God has honored that desire and the burdens I felt when parenting my children are overshadowed by the blessings I am now experiencing.
Children are A LOT of work but think of all the EXERCISE we're getting! If I could just sit all day would I really want that? No! God is true to His Word. He wasn't lying when He said children were a blessing. When life beats us down and we begin to look at them as burdens, then we can cry out to God and He can change our perspective. I have never had God leave the prayer of, "Help me to love and ENJOY my children" unanswered. Not only can He help me to enjoy them, He can even help me enjoy pulling a paper towel lever.... and enjoying our children will cause our peace to flow like a river.
Slowing down to enjoy everyday life with my children is one of the greatest lessons I have learned as a mom. A mom once told me she saw me leave Wal-Mart with five children and she noticed I was having the best time and smiling. And, yes, I did say Wal-Mart. She thought it was because I was a great mother. It was really because I serve a great God who pointed out to me the source of much of my frustration and lack of joy. He taught me how to relish in my life's work. My God taught me to smell the roses....even in public restrooms. And even when the roses look a lot like paper towels.
"Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from Him." Psalms 127:3
Posted by Kara Akins at 7:29 PM 15 comments
Friday, April 4, 2008
Angry Mom
I guess being a mom of six children has required me to learn a thing or two about the whole parenting thing. I guess it would make sense to post a word of encouragement/advice from time to time to encourage other mothers. Even if it is advice you already know it can stir your heart to hear it again (mine, too). Mommas talking about being mommas makes us want to be better mommas. That simple.
Parenting
Topic: Tone of Voice
One of the things I pay the most attention to when addressing my children is my tone of voice. The secret to great parenting is now out of the bag. I say that because when a mother controls her tone of voice when addressing her children people's ear perk up. They're impressed. So simple, but so effective. I have also learned over time that if my tone is good then how I respond and/or address my children is good, too.
My advice for today is if/when you become irritated or if there is an "issue" to address then first find a gentle tone. Also, allow your hands, touch, etc to be gentle. Gentleness actually deters irritability and produces amazing self control. It makes you feel like a REAL MOM and not an impostor that should have a photo on America's Most Wanted.
We can't discipline, train or inspire our children towards better behavior if we're irritable so taking a moment to shake off the irritability is worth it. Our tone of voice greatly effects our level of irritability. Tired of being so irritable all the time? Then try changing your tone. In addition, incredible words of wisdom (I mean sentences that you can't believe came from you and not Dr. James Dobson) tend to flow from a controlled tone of voice. And when we have no control over our tone.... let's not even think of the things that can come out of our mouths when that happens! It's enough to make the best of the best of mommas wince because of their own "shocking" behavior.
Verse:Romans 12:21
"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."
Posted by Kara Akins at 1:32 PM 9 comments
Labels: Parenting Advice
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
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